Grumpy the Rally Van

[ihatemybike]

All the crap that you see in that pic was in the van when I bought it. I've removed everything that I could without vacuuming, still quite a mess though. Not sure what I'll have in it for the rally yet, really depends on how many people get on board. Right now, I appear to be alone since the one person I had willing to go hasn't returned any of my calls for a couple weeks now. I was able to get some free benches for it though.

Here's the interior shots from when I first bought it.

[potskie]

I could not locate the severed human hand!!! please point it out lol

[ihatemybike]

Working on a Craigslist ad to find team members. What do you guys think?

Adventure, heh. Excitement, heh. A Jedi craves not these things.

No Jedis here, so lets scare ourselves a little by forming a team and participating in the BA/BE Rally.

The BA/BE Rally is a four day automotive rally May 22nd through May 25th from New York (Big Apple) to New Orleans (Big Easy) where competitor teams drive vehicles purchased for $250 or less. Along the way photos are matched and various games are played to accumulate points. Whoever can drive their beater to New Orleans while acquiring the most points wins. 1st place wins $1500 and free entry to the next years rally, 2nd $350, 3rd $150.

According to rally veterans, the rally is really not about winning, but about the experience. The route takes you through some beautiful sections of the Appalachian Mountains, which includes the Skyline Drive through Shenandoah National Park, Blue Ridge Parkway through Virginia and North Carolina, and Deals Gap Road (aka The Tail of the Dragon) which features 318 curves over 11 miles. I drove the Dragon last September and it is definitely a driver’s treat.

While the rally is based out of a host hotel each night and teams get a discounted rate at these hotels, sleeping accommodations it up to the team. Many options available here.

Registration costs $250 per team, which pays for the prizes, use of long range walkie talkies, route maps, and event organizers overhead.

Sounds fun, but where to get a $250 car that will make the trip? No need for you to worry about that. The vehicle, title, license, registration, and insurance have already been taken care by me.

Meet Grumpy the Rally Van.


Grumpy is a 1997 Chevrolet Astro AWD with 297k miles that was purchased last December. During 2007 Grumpy lived a hard life as a delivery van based out of Milwaukee and according to the previous title accumulated 118 k miles in 11 months. It is dented, dirty, and currently only starts with starting fluid, but once it gets going it drives just fine. During the next few weeks Grumpy will receive a tune-up and fluid changes. Mr.Goodwrench told me that the inability to start without starting fluid is most likely due to a week fuel pump. I’ve replaced a few of these in Astro vans before so a spare pump and the required tools will be brought on the rally to swap if needed, but I’m hoping to get away with leaving it alone.

In addition to making sure the van runs okay, I am going to try popping as many dents as possible and would like to give it a cheapo paint job. Here is what I would like Grumpy to look like when we run the rally.


My current guesstimate is that Grumpy will use 200 gallons of fuel to complete the Chicago - New York – New Orleans – Chicago loop and with the news forecasting $4 per gallon this summer the budget is $800 for gas, but hopefully it won’t be quite that bad.

What I require of team members. Not much really, just a willingness to have fun and pay your fair share. No mechanical skills needed, no drivers license needed if you just want to ride along.

Registration $250
Fuel $800
Total $1050

Cost per person:
1 = $1050, 2 = $525, 3 = $350, 4 = $263
5 = $210, 6 = $176, 7 = $150, 8 = $132

Think you are crazy enough for this? Send me an email and we'll talk.

[ihatemybike]

I could not locate the severed human hand!!! please point it out lol

Expand the pic, then look in the foot well.

[potskie]

I FOUND IT!!!! dude one year me and a buddy covered a couple of those fake ones in pigs blood then closed the rear hatch down on em so it looked like a dudes hands got crushed in it and they were still there. You SHOULD SO DO THAT. with the cargo doors for the rally you know it would be awesome!

[ihatemybike]

Not with the A-Team van, but it gives me an idea for another year. Make one look like the van for the Chicago city morgue.

[midnighthunder89]

It looks good. Just make sure you mention them driving and must be licensed and stuff. maybe in future years i can join up with you... we will see.

[ihatemybike]

Just got my first ticket with Grumpy, for disobeying a police officer. $75, at least it's not a moving violation.

[potskie]

Just got my first ticket with Grumpy, for disobeying a police officer. $75, at least it's not a moving violation.

That's what you got for not being a sheep. Being a sheep is WAYYYY cheaper.

[ihatemybike]

What sucks is I wasn't even trying to disobey, the situation just worked out that way. Had I know it was gonna cost me $75 I would have made it worth my wild.

[midnighthunder89]

aw bummer what did you do to deserve it.

[ihatemybike]

I was sent on the lunch run at work. We had been informed that there was a significant gas leak near the building I work at and the was a fireman at the end of the drive directing traffic away from it and further away I passed a road block preventing through traffic from continuing. On the way back the police wouldn't let me by to return to work, saying running vehicles are a hazard, while I look at running firetrucks and Nicor trucks that were much closer to the leak than I would ever have to be. They were sending us off into a parking lot across the street (that we do not have permission to park in) to turn around. This lot also has a driveway directly across the street from works and the route through the lot takes you right by this driveway, so I thought I'd ask the same fireman that was standing there when I left if it was ok to cross into work's driveway. The fireman waved me through, I got parked and Mr.Officer pulls up gets out and starts demanding my license. I kindly asked what I did wrong and what I'm being charged with, but only got "Give me your license!" as a reply. After a couple exchanges of asking the charge/demanding my license, he threatened to tow Grumpy. Can't have that, so I relinquished my license and proof of insurance. He got in his car (engine still running) and did his thing, then came back with a court appearance mandatory ticket for disobeying a police officer. When I told him the fireman waved me through, he told he didn't care and that no vehicles were allowed beyond theirs. Yet the lot they were sending us into is beyond theirs. Tried to talk to the fireman afterwards to get some backup, but of course he wants nothing to do with it. Just a bad situation, that leaves me frustrated. Having money be so tight right now doesn't help either.

[midnighthunder89]

too bad you cant fight that ticket. you can't can you? sorry about that well gl with everything.

[ihatemybike]

I don't know. I figure plea my case to the judge, point out my lack of any previous police record, and hope for leniency.

[midnighthunder89]

good luck.