Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally, the guys' side of the story. ( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear 'the rules' From the female side ...Now here are the rules from the male side .
These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '
ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports: It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1... Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one :
Subtle hints do not work !
Strong hints do not work !
Obvious hints do not work !
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact , all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are .
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched..
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football or motor sports
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
Man Rules
Re: Man Rules
LMAO, I've seen it a few times but its still very true and would stop alot of fights if the female species understood it better.
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- Retired
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I plan to be buried in my van
- Posts: 1209
- Joined: Wed Sep 20, 2006 5:42 pm
- Location: Lost Angels, Sovern KarlyFornia.
Re: Man Rules
Always makes me laugh everytime I read this....
`86 V8 Lowered Cargo, extensively modified, shaved bald, wearing the shortest, sluttyest white primer dress....
A British Wanker living in So KarlyFornia.
My Astro tows my toys to Glamis sand dunes http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jp2pqjQtpso
First ever canal jump at Glamis http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXZjM84x_Xc
A British Wanker living in So KarlyFornia.
My Astro tows my toys to Glamis sand dunes http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jp2pqjQtpso
First ever canal jump at Glamis http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXZjM84x_Xc
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- I have my van tatooed on my cheeks
- Posts: 2667
- Joined: Sat Dec 02, 2006 12:34 pm
- Location: Orlando, FL
Re: Man Rules
Very funny........it's been going on since man lived in caves. Although I think "YES DEAR" will take care of most problems.
1996 Safari SLX Hotair balloon transport vehicle
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- I plan to be buried in my van
- Posts: 2153
- Joined: Sun Sep 10, 2006 6:45 pm
- Location: Selah, WA
- Contact:
Re: Man Rules
Yeah, I was laughing again as I read it. It's just so true!
Matt
Selah, WA
-96 GMC Safari AWD Hi-Top Conversion -->Stalled 5.3L swap & 5" lift
-74 Ford Bronco -->Far from perfect but mine!
-99 V-10 Ford Super Duty Super Cab 4x4 -->Stock with 285 Cooper ATs
-00 Ford Focus Wagon -->The Red Turd
-95 Ford 24' Class C Motorhome -->My big block sleeper
-07 Can-Am Outlander XT -->My yellow 4x4 quad for work & play
-04 Ski Doo REV Summit -->Still several chassis behind!
No new projects until the current ones are done!
Selah, WA
-96 GMC Safari AWD Hi-Top Conversion -->Stalled 5.3L swap & 5" lift
-74 Ford Bronco -->Far from perfect but mine!
-99 V-10 Ford Super Duty Super Cab 4x4 -->Stock with 285 Cooper ATs
-00 Ford Focus Wagon -->The Red Turd
-95 Ford 24' Class C Motorhome -->My big block sleeper
-07 Can-Am Outlander XT -->My yellow 4x4 quad for work & play
-04 Ski Doo REV Summit -->Still several chassis behind!
No new projects until the current ones are done!