*Caution... They Walk Among Us!*

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tbhager94
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*Caution... They Walk Among Us!*

Post by tbhager94 »

Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: 'Free to good home'. You want it, you take it.'

For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: 'Fridge for sale $50.'

The next day someone stole it.*

*Caution... They Walk Among Us!*


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*One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted.... 'Look at that dead bird!' Someone looked up at the sky and said...'where???'*

*They Walk among us!!*

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*While looking at a house, my brother asked the estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, 'Does the sun rise in the north?' When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, 'Oh, I don't keep up with that kind of stuff.' *

*They Walk Among Us!!*

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*My colleague and I were eating lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the beach. She drove down in a convertible, but 'didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving'.*

*They Walk Among Us!!!!*

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*I told the girl at the steakhouse register that I wanted the half-pound sirloin. She informed me they only had an 8 ounce sirloin. Not wanting to make a scene, I told her I would take the 8 ounce steak instead of the half-pound*

*They walk among us! *

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My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it's designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped She keeps it in the trunk...*

*They Walk Among Us!!!!!*

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My friends and I were on a Lager run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%.

Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.... *

*They Walk Among Us!!!!!!*

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I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, 'Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?'

I had to explain that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned...*

*They Walk Among Us!!!!!!! *

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I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. 'Now,' she asked me, 'Has your plane arrived yet?'...*

*They Walk Among Us!!!!!!!!*

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While working at a pizza parlour I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. 'Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.'*

*Yep, They Walk Among Us, too.!!!!!!!!*
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*Sadly, not only do they walk among us, they

also reproduce and even scarier....THEY

VOTE!*
2000 chev blazer 4x4
If its got tits or wheels, its gonna give you problems!
im sure we all know the #1 junk yard rule if it fits in your pocket its free.

phr1$k37
I plan to be buried in my van
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Re: *Caution... They Walk Among Us!*

Post by phr1$k37 »


Hhahaha I like!
I liked the Fridge, Airport and Lager the most. Thanks for sharing!
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d3athm3talh3ad
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Re: *Caution... They Walk Among Us!*

Post by d3athm3talh3ad »

one of my co-workers came in from getting spaghetti for lunch, and a spaghetti noodle was hanging out of the styrofoam tray, he walks in, i say 'hey...your noodle's hanging out' he moved the box out of the way and looked at his crotch to see if his fly was open... :rolleyes:
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GEJ
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Re: *Caution... They Walk Among Us!*

Post by GEJ »

Going to steal one of the things from Peter's emails.(Sorry Peter) A old lady was at a funeral parlor attending her husband's funeral.The undertaker leaned down and asked her how old her husband was.She told him 95 and was only 4 yrs older than her.After a pause-she turns to the undertaker and says"it's hardly worth going home isn't". :muhaha:
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